Leah Farmer

Personal perspectives on faith, literature, and life.

I am here now…

REJECTION

Sometimes we don’t throw ourselves into it because we put ourselves out there in the past and discovered that snipers were crouching on every roof. We were shot down. Criticized. It blew up in our face. No one liked what we did. We believed we failed.

When we don’t throw ourselves completely into it and we hold back our best efforts because of what happened in the past, we are letting the past decide the future.

First of all…Thank you again Rob Bell. Pastor to the people. Pastor to me.

Second…As I read this short chapter titled “Rejection” I wept. I wept because I just came off of a hostile, sniper-filled experience. It felt like failure. It felt like it was a last chance. It felt like I would not recover.

And I can admit for many days and weeks I worried that I’d never be myself again. That I’d never be the best version of me. That I’d never fix the broken pieces.

Then I talked to my friends.

Then I went to therapy.

Then I took good care of myself.

Then I offered myself love.

Then I served others.

Then I read what Rob said.

Then I remembered that I have NEVER been defined by my past.

Then I decided that I sure as hell wasn’t starting now.

The world can be brutal. The world can be beautiful.

I will show up. I will live. I will do what I’ve promised myself in writing…Be, Believe, Speak, & Write.

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