Like all parents, mine told conditional stories like…
…You can date when you are 16.
…When you are older, you can wear makeup.
…You can buy that when you save enough money.
But one of the ones that stuck with me was…
…Big girls shouldn’t wear white jeans.
So I never ever did. I have never worn white jeans. I have promised myself that I would buy a pair when I got to this or that goal weight. Keep in mine I’m 38 and no matter what the number was I always withheld the “prize” of white jeans.
…If you have a chubby face, don’t cut your hair too short.
So I kept my hair longer. Even though I sincerely wanted to have a pixie cut or a bob or whatever else through the years. I kept it longer because it was a veil. I have even referred to it as “my one beauty” like Jo in “Little Women”…half joking…only half. And then last year, I cut all my hair off. I was 37 when I finally got the haircut I’d wanted since my early 20’s.
…When you lose enough weight, you can join the hot yoga class.
So I stayed away until one year for Christmas Miss Joyce gave me classes and agreed to go with me. And I fell in love with yoga in a way I’ve never loved any exercise in my life. Oh and by the way…I’m not so bad at it because it is a blend of strength AND flexibility. If only I’d taken that chance sooner. Sigh. Bygones.
The list could go on and on. I share this because I don’t want people…women, men, tall, skinny, fat, black, white, whatever…to give themselves rules based on ARBITRARY facts. We give so much power to the arbitrary things of life. We give our freedom to stupid things. To jobs. To people. To the size of our ass.
And then one day we hopefully realize that we are free. There is freedom in stepping into the salon for the haircut. Hooking into the skis. Unrolling your yoga mat next to the 6 foot model in the tiny tiny shorts. Taking the stage to share wisdom with a room full of people. And slipping into the cute white jeans, feeling sexy, and ROCKING them!
Release the cuffs of the arbitrary.
Take up your God-given freedom. Including the freedom to rock your white jeans!
Do the things you want to do. Try them. And should the haircut look bad or the sky diving not be as great as you think, just chalk it up to the fact that not everyone loves it rather than a product of your failure to listen to the annoying voice in your head who tells you not to try. Because that dude…the voice…is a douchebag who prefers captivity.